They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
