Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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