You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize