You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Randomize
