That's when you crack a 10am beer
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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