we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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