love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize
