there was a trapeze. enough said
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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