He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
