mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm too high and old for this...
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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