The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
