It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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