She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
did i walk over a car last night?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
