If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
