So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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