After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
