Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I need to sanitize my soul.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
