If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
