It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So vagazzling was a success
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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