I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
