I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize