He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
