the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
