Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
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