Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Randomize
