You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
