Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
are you so shy because you have an std?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize