yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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