everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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