wakey wakey hands off snakey
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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