thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
