I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
