I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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