i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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