i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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