And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Will you blow on my dice?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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