Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
