he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
