I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
