so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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