He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
