doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
