my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
