is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
