My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
