I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I smell like Dick and happiness
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize