will power is for people who don't want to get laid
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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