If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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