I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
All I want is dick and wine.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
