Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
